New Fall's Resolutions

Hi everyone,

I took a bit of a blog sabbatical recently. I've been settling into Fall, which is my favorite transition of the year. I've been in the city much more consistently lately, and without all the weekend trips I've been able to get a more solid look at my life here.
In the literal sense, I've been cleaning my room and beginning the Herculean task of switching out summer for winter clothes. This wouldn't be a huge deal for a more normal person, but it's shocking, given how small my room is, how difficult it is to find things that I squirreled away six months ago. For example, two nights ago, I went to sleep positive that the huge shopping bag filled with all my pairs of boots had been stolen by someone who had a serious penchant for Fryes (hence the fact that only my boots were gone...not jewelry or money or anything that actually made sense). This illusion was shattered when I woke up with a start a few hours later, remembering the bag had been tossed into the very top part of my closet that I can only reach with a stepladder. It's been one of those kind of weeks - productive, but also a confirmation of my own craziness.
I've also been getting in touch with my inner child more than usual, thanks to a new babysitting job I've picked up. I babysat a lot in college, and I've learned that Manhattan children can be a mixed bag (although I've been very lucky overall). One thing that's certain is they all have differing levels of dependence on TV, Guitar Hero, various Apple products, and all sorts of Wii games - except for this new charge of mine. He would rather act out complicated battle sequences with Star Wars legos or listen to my stories about Timothy the Invincible Frog (trust me, that one's a winner) than watch some sort of offensive cartoon on Comedy Central. It's unbelievable refreshing. When I picked him up from school the other day, he went on and on about the alligator he'd made in Crafts class (and all the special powers he had) like it was an iPad or something. As someone whose childhood was dictated almost entirely by their own imagination, I feel such a strong sense of camaraderie when I hear him whispering dialogue between two Lego figures as he jumps from the bed to the floor.
So, there's been a lot going on lately, and I'm back to the blog, among other things. Since I should probably reference the title at some point in this post, I've never been someone who's put a lot of stock in New Year's Resolutions, but this year I am way into New Fall's resolutions. There's something about the change from Summer to Fall that feels much more transitional than Winter into more Winter (as it is at New Year's). Blogging regularly again is one of several New Fall's resolutions I've made. Where the job search fueled my blogging before, I'll have to figure out something to take its place - hopefully writing (of which there will be more up here later today - fingers crossed).
Anyway, even though it's 83 and humid in New York today, there is a slight breeze in the air that signals Fall's maybe-arrival. There are some brown leaves on that tree out there - is it the change of seasons or maybe some sort of arboreal disease? I'm choosing to think it's the start of something new.

(Not So) Lazy Sunday

I was very not lazy today. My day was all about wine stores and foreign policy. Quite the combination.
I spent the morning running around the Upper East Side on a double edged mission: to visit the wine stores on my list and find a newsstand that sold Foreign Affairs, which was actually much more complicated than I anticipated.
I made some significant headway in the wine store arena. While I keep (probably annoyingly) pestering Sherry Lehman and Italian Wine Merchants, they aren't hiring yet, so I've set my sights on a couple of less prestigious but still comprehensive stores. One is Union Square Wines and the second is ABC Wine Company, in Alphabet City. I found out about ABC through the owner's blog, East Village Wine Geek, which is really informative and funny. I met with the managers at both places and gave them my resume, so there's a chance (fingers crossed) that something will pull through soon. In the meantime, there are inevitably more stores to visit, but I needed to donate a significant amount of my day to interview prep.
As I mentioned before, I've been feeling less than confident about this job (Publishing Associate at Foreign Affairs), due mostly to the concentration of rejection I've gotten in the past month and also to the fact that this job is outside my immediate comfort zone. However, that's what branching out is all about, right? In any event, I felt less than qualified, which is silly since they wouldn't waste their time interviewing me if I weren't. Suffice it to say, I was a little worried that I wasn't going to be able to go in guns blazing tomorrow. And, like most people, when I'm not feeling comfortable, it shows. A lot. Not exactly the best mindset pre-job interview.
However, today I discovered that knowledge is power. I bought Foreign Affairs and Foreign Policy Magazine, revisited my experience with online marketing and social media, had a long and very helpful discussion with my beloved CFR insider, visited possibly every link on the Foreign Affairs website, and (several hours later) felt exponentially better about everything.
I feel as if I have a handle on the magazine's approach to social media, and I see places where they could improve their connection to their online readers, create more of a community, which they could then use to market in a more tailored way to those readers - the ultimate goal in social networking for any business. Basically, it's gotten me so excited about this interview. Working for a non-partisan, foreign affairs-focused magazine isn't what I anticipated when I graduated from school, but this opportunity is honestly the one that I've been the most excited about in months. I'm beginning to realize (a little late, maybe) that I never really felt passionate about book publishing. It's just always what I thought I should do, what I had internship experience in, etc. I love to write. I love to read about books and authors and everything publishing-related, but that definitely doesn't mean I should work in publishing. If anything, it probably means I shouldn't.
Plus, listening to the podcasts, round tables, and just reading the articles and mission statement of Foreign Affairs has me so beyond excited. The thought of working with such intelligent, driven, and forward-thinking people is incredible. Plus, while I (admittedly) am no expert in international relations, the research I have done is fascinating, and the prospect of publishing essays and commentary by major players in the world is obviously pretty amazing.
So, my Sunday was the opposite of lazy, basically. I'm going to go write, like, 8 more outlines of points I want to hit tomorrow (I get a little obsessive), and go to bed.
Send me good, lucky vibes tomorrow!

For some added entertainment, I give you the inspiration for the title of this entry:

NYC was pretty today

And I got to experience a little bit of it! En route to some post-work decompression, I sauntered down 17th street from Park to 8th Avenue.



I've been feeling a little down lately, I must admit. While optimism is the name of my game, as I think it needs to be if you're 22 (almost 23. Yikes.) and this is the only job market you've ever known, it's tough to realize that I graduated from Barnard one year ago yesterday. While I personally think I've worked hard and learned a great deal, it's difficult because I feel I have very little that's tangible to show for it. There have been moments in the past couple of days when I've felt like it might be impossible for me to get a job (with all the interviews, no offers, etc), which is a very disheartening and ridiculous thing to think, I know. It's also a potentially dangerous mindset to be in, considering my interview at CFR on Monday. My confidence needs to absolutely be at its height, but there's a more than faint voice in my head telling me I'm not qualified for the job, which has never happened before. This is ridiculous for a lot of reasons - the first and only real one being that CFR has chosen to interview me, which they would not do if I weren't qualified (plus my spy there told me that they received thousands of resumes - a little necessary self-congratulation).
I'm not sure why, since I've obviously received plentiful rejections from Publishing houses before, but this latest one has really affected me. It's the first time one of my mentors or contacts has interviewed me for a job, so that sort of experience is new, I guess. Whatever the reason, I'm a bit shaken, so I have decided that I need to get (even more) proactive, as my parents would say. Thanks, Mom and Dad.
This weekend shall be Francesca's Weekend of Wine Stores. While I've been somewhat sporadically pursuing different places, concerned about prestige or selection or location up until now, I am going to hit the pavement this weekend, resumes in hand, and, I hope, have a second job by Sunday night. I'll chronicle the journey here to make sure I stay on my toes (and that I actually do it). Who knows, maybe I'll taste some good things along the way. After all, drinking on the job is one of the fringe benefits of this operation.
Oh, and, yes, I realize I need to write something, at the risk of sounding like a non-productive broken record. I will. Tomorrow. I swear.

Inaugural Entry, or, My Quest for Fulfilment

Hello, all.

Some of you may or may not be aware that I previously dabbled in a blog over last summer, with the intent of chronicling my job search. This, for a couple of reasons, did not work out. Mostly, it had to do with the fact that I took the process, including the many rejections, far too personally, and wasn't thrilled at the prospect of sharing them. That, and, since graduating college, my stick-to-it-iveness is lacking.
Now, I find myself in a place that feels increasingly different and similar to my situation last summer. I am living in New York, no longer at home, and I have a job that pays my bills, but it's not one that satisfies me further than that. I am lucky to have my job (as a receptionist for a financial firm), but my feeling of restlessness and desire for something creatively challenging are ultimately the same as when I first attempted to blog about them.
I have decided (with some inspiration and nudging from others) to be active instead of passive, and, while my job search continues, look for other ways to apply myself and fulfill some of my whims and serious goals. Like:

• Taking my writing seriously, which would involve other people reading it.
• Learning more about wine, something I find equally delightful and intimidating. I'm looking to remedy this by finding a part-time job in a wine store. Why pay to take a class when you can learn (and drink?) on the job?
• Giving back in some way. A lot of the volunteer programs I'm currently looking at involve literacy and children, although I am very open to new ideas and suggestions.
• Cooking, in a baptism by fire sort of way. Again, why spend money on a class when I have an Alice Waters cookbook & a tiny Manhattan kitchen?
  
• Trying (in the long term, which for me means in the next 1-2 years) to get back to Europe, preferably Italy. Still attempting to figure those specifics out.
  

I'm taking a hard look at things I've always wanted to do and trying to make them happen in a regulated way, ie. keeping myself accountable for taking action and going after opportunities I want. This is where you come in.
I've always wanted to write a regular (as in, every day, we'll see how that goes) blog, but to have it focus on something specific that I could reflect on each day. Thus, this blog now exists (check one thing off the list!). Through this little outlet, I want to both keep myself on track, and share my progress and adventures with you along the way. I'm hoping to include everything from things I write to tales from the job search and everything in between, depending where the journey takes me.

Ultimately, I'm looking to take life in a new direction, and hoping to share it with you!

Thanks for reading this ridiculous rant of self-discovery (I hope I don't sound like a walking cliche), and I will be back tomorrow!

x-Francesca